You have one more week to Do the Puyallup. For those who have just joined us here in Washington state, the Puyallup [0] was formerly known as the Western Washington Fair, and you have until Sept. 23 to enjoy it.
The fair is about an hour south of Seattle -- in Puyallup, naturally -- and has everything you could want of a state fair: amusement park rides, livestock displays, live entertainment, cotton candy and deep-fried everything (even beef stroganoff). Nothing could be more American -- except, perhaps, taking an afternoon off from work to visit the fair. That's exactly what the NWsource staff did this week, and we're pleased to share our recommendations with you. We invite you to slather on the sunscreen, load the kids into the Subaru, plunk down your 10 bucks at the gate and follow in our footsteps.
To help you get started, we offer a few of our fair favorites:
FOOD
Onion rings
Skip the fried mushrooms, and forgo the fries. It's onion rings you really want: delicious, beer-battered, irregularly sized and shaped onion rings, hot from the deep fryer, with a side of marinara sauce. The best booth is the one on Grand Avenue that also sells fried cheese sticks and other deep-fried veggies. The batter is crispy, the onions are sweet and it's all greasy enough to satisfy you for hours.
Earthquake Burgers
There is most likely no other time of year when you can take pride in eating a burger the size of your face. Pick up a half-pound "cheesequake" oozing American or Swiss and a passel of grilled onions at Earthquake Burgers on the eastern end of Grand Avenue, and stuff yourself silly.
Scones (Duh!)
If you enjoy just one indulgence at the Puyallup, this should be it. Flaky, jam-filled Fisher scones have been a Fair staple since 1915. We're going to eat 100 of them at the 2015 Fair, in celebration of their centennial. This year, we exercised a little restraint and shared a dozen.
RIDES
Giant Slide
We haven't seen potatoes in a potato sack in years. These days, the best thing we can think to do with a potato sack is slide down the Giant Slide at the fair. It's nearly impossible not to grin from ear to ear and go: "Whoooa-ooooa-OOOOA!" as you zoom down the corrugated plastic slide and skid to a gentle halt on the carpet at the bottom. If you're the only adult there -- who cares?
Skyride
We used to love the Skyway at Disneyland, a pleasant gondola ride that would transport you from Fantasyland to Tomorrowland via a suspended cable. It's gone now, but the Puyallup's Skyride floats on, transporting fairgoers from one end of the fair to the other and affording a modestly spectacular view in the process. Fascinating fact: The Skyride was built for the 1962 Seattle World's Fair, which makes it the scariest ride on the grounds. Think about it: It's three times older than the average fairgoer.
Extreme Scream
This amusement park staple is worth every penny of its $10 admission fee. (Note: Mondays through Thursdays, two can ride for the price of one, so grab a friend.) A blast of air fires you up a giant tower, hundreds of feet skyward... and once you've reached the top, 20 stories up, you are fired downward with a force and speed equivalent to your ascent. You'll laugh, you'll scream, you'll cheer and, hopefully, you'll remember to hit the bathroom before you ride.
SHOWS AND EXHIBITS
Livestock barns
Ride-averse fairgoers and parents with little ones who might be overwhelmed by the intimidating size and sounds of the fair will find respite in the somewhat calmer environment of the livestock barns. Tykes can practice their animal sounds as they point and chatter excitedly at the feathered and furry creatures. Some of the animals exhibited will change from day to day: We encountered lots of goats on our visit, as well as some incredibly large beef cattle and a variety of fowl, including pigeons, turkeys and some memorable geese with satiny, curly feathers.
Kids' shows
If the idea of Spongebob Squarepants shaking his tail feather along with a bevy of audience "volunteers" sounds like a rockin' good time, then you're probably a five-year-old -- or in the company of one. If you don't mind the commercial tie-in to popular kids' television characters, the Toonzville Tent is a fine place to take your little ones for some kid-friendly entertainment. The featured Nickelodeon characters vary, so plan ahead if you're particularly fond of Diego (Sept. 15-17), Jimmy Neutron (Sept. 18-20) or Spongebob (Sept. 21-23). If you're so inclined, you can even opt for a photo op.
PERKS
Foot massagers
Across Grand Avenue from Earthquake Burgers is perhaps the fair's cheapest thrill: a jiggly, automated, 50-cent foot massage. Sit in the hand-shaped chair and rest your weary feet on the vibrating metal plate. Reflexology it ain't, but the tingly sensation you'll walk away with is good for a giggle.
Free Advil
At the intersection of Grand Avenue and Showplace Way, you'll find the Advil booth and a free two-pack of painkillers. You may not need it early in your visit, but when the Puyallup becomes a teenage wasteland at dusk, trust us, you will.
DO WHAT WE DID
Spend a few bucks frivolously
Buy yourself some cheap sunglasses ($8!) from a vendor along Midway Boulevard. They look nothing like designer glasses, or even designer knock-offs for that matter, but unlike the gold-embroidered "I love dough" baseball cap, you can work 'em with a straight face -- and a little flair. --Monica Fischer, online editor
Solidify your vegetarian smugness
It's no wonder your friends, who just finished eating a plate of pork ribs, don't want to see the baby pigs -- but you haven't touched pork in a decade. Watch the playful piglets nudge each other with their tiny snouts and inspect their world with natural curiosity and intelligence. Who could eat them? --Neal Schindler, associate online editor
Let your kids go
Tired parents with restless toddlers who are straining at the straps of their strollers should turn 'em loose in the enclosed petting area of the livestock barn. On our visit, the docile, woolly sheep grazed obliviously as little hands patted and poked at its blanketed body, and the little pygmy goat darted nimbly between the fast-moving feet of his visitors, searching out tasty bits of hay on the ground. The well-equipped hand-washing stations nearby make cleanup easy before hitting the scone stand. --Jane Keller Watson, senior online editor</p>
Just look at people
The bearded frontiersman types. The teenagers in goth makeup. The dazed-looking Seattleites, who came to the fair fully expecting to find foodstuffs that hadn't been deep-fried. People-watching at the Puyallup is better than any movie you saw this summer, and it's free with the price of admission. --Geoff Carter, staff writer
TIPS FOR DOING THE FAIR WITH SMALL KIDS
Little ones don't hold up long in exciting environments, so put a little extra planning into your visit to make sure you and your family get the most out of your entrance fee. Check the Fair's Web site [1] before you go and try to focus on just a few things to enjoy. When the tantrums start, remember, you can always come back another day -- or another year. Pack some healthy snacks and water, and pick out one or two special Fair treats to indulge in; you don't want to be standing in long lines with restless kids. Finally, try to visit with at least one other adult or capable helper so you can take turns chasing after Junior while the other totes the video camera and records some precious family memories.
Copyright © 2008 The Seattle Times Company
