Wedding shows: Things to know before you walk down aisles of options

At the beginning of each year, countless yards of white satin and lace hit the Northwest as myriad wedding shows go down. From Tacoma to Bellevue, from downtown Seattle to Everett, hundreds of brides-to-be (and their entourage of mothers and bridesmaids) will flock to these grand events in search of anything and everything wedding-related, which is exactly what can make these shows wonderful and stressful at the same time.

On one hand, wedding shows can be a huge help. They offer insights into the latest wedding styles and trends, from party favors and food to fashion. Money-saving opportunities also abound, so brides can manage to save a good chunk of change if they play the game right. And one of the biggest wedding-show bonuses is that brides can see and do everything — from sampling cake to trying on dresses to flipping through photographer portfolios — all in one place at one time.

However, this same opportunity to experience absolutely everything can also be the downfall of many brides: It can overwhelm them with too many options and exposes them to things they don't need, things they didn't think they wanted until they saw them, and things they often can't afford. Nevertheless, the six upcoming wedding shows in the Seattle area can be beneficial if brides arm themselves with good information, as well as keep in mind some common wedding-show pitfalls to avoid. So before brides say "I do" to a wedding show nearby, here are a few things to consider doing first.

PICK A SHOW

The biggest is the Seattle Wedding Show, but bigger doesn't always mean better for every bride. See the individual show descriptions to pick which one or two are best for you. In general, if you're planning on getting married close to home, it's a good idea to pick a wedding show near where you live, as this show will primarily feature vendors from your particular area. For example, if you live in Tacoma, going to the Everett show is fine for gathering ideas, but if you're looking to pick up information on area photographers, wedding venues, caterers, etc., you may be out of luck.

PREPARE — PHYSICALLY

To enjoy a wedding show to the fullest, it's good to prepare your body as well as your mind. These shows are basically big trade shows in exhibition halls or convention centers with hard, unforgiving cement floors, so be sure to wear good walking shoes and comfortable clothes. And if you plan on trying on dresses at the show, remember to wear something that is easy to take off and put on.

Linda Marshall, a Northwest wedding planner with 20 years of experience, recommends treating a wedding show almost like an athletic event. "Make sure that you eat well before you go and drink water along the way," she says. "It's stressful as you are making big decisions, so you want to be as comfortable as possible all day."

A bouquet by La Vassar Florist, Inc.

Marshall also suggests allotting plenty of time in your schedule. "To make the most out of a show, go the first day to tour around and look at photographers, flowers, etc. Then go back the second day and plan to spend 3-4 hours with a certain focus in mind."

A couple of handy items to bring are digital cameras and pre-printed mailing labels. Taking photos of flowers and displays you like can help determine your style later, even if you're not ready to make any big decisions right then and there (just ask permission before snapping away). And mailing labels will save you time and, hopefully, money.

"If you bring labels with your name and contact info you can easily get on every vendor's list without taking the time to fill out forms," advises Brad Buckles, president of BridesClub.com and Wedding Expos.

But in the age of spam, do you really want to be on every vendor's list? According to Buckles, it's somewhat necessary: Getting on "the list" is the best way to take advantage of special prices that are only available through the shows. If you're worried about an onslaught of unwanted e-mails, he suggests setting up a new e-mail account through Hotmail or Yahoo! that's especially for show correspondence.

"That way you won't be inundated with wedding e-mails at work," says Buckles, "and you can simply turn it off or quit checking it once you have what you need."

Another important thing to bring is a to-do list, as it's very easy to get distracted by the bells and whistles booth after booth. But make sure to create a realistic list. Here is a breakdown of what most brides can or can't realistically accomplish at a typical wedding show, according to Linda Marshall:

Booths featuring items such as candy as fun favors or gifts can be a lot of fun.

Realistic
• Find a photographer (or at the very least, a photographic style you like)
• Find a wedding venue (from ranches to wineries, hotels to golf courses)
• Find a florist (or at the very least, a floral style that suits you)
• Find a cake decorator (and taste-test away!)
• Find entertainment (hear harp players, saxophonists and bands on talent stages)
• Pick a rental company (from linens and chair covers to canopies)
• Find fun favors or gifts (these booths can be some of the most fun to check out)
• Witness the latest trends (from chocolate fountains to video guest books)
• Enter to win drawings and sign up for more info
• Set follow-up appointments with vendors

Unrealistic
• Find a wedding dress (if you know what you're looking for or you scoped out a dress before the show, it's possible to get your dress at a show and get a good deal on it, but for most brides, choosing a dress from start to finish is a longer, more in-depth, store-to-store process)
• Choosing a caterer or menu (most couples want to see full menus, sample the fare, and figure out their venue first, as many locations have on-site caterers, but you certainly can make a short list of your preferences here)
• Meeting a marriage commissioner or clergy (this usually happens outside of the show, and is often dependent on the venue as well)
• Finding invitations (it's good to check out all the styles, but realistically, invitations are probably one of the last things to nail down because of the sheer amount of information that will go into them)
• Securing a honeymoon destination (you can get ideas and request follow-up calls, but you will most likely not be able to book your flight at the show)

PREPARE — MENTALLY

No matter how organized and ready to plan you are, attending wedding shows can be an emotional undertaking. So, in addition to preparing physically before you go, it's also a good idea to prepare mentally.

First, it's good for brides and their accompanying show-goers to be aware of some Northwest wedding stats. "In the next six months, up to 32,000 people in Puget Sound will get married," says Brad Buckles. "The largest percentage of brides get engaged between Thanksgiving and New Year's, which makes the day after New Year's the biggest day of the year for wedding-related telephone calls, and the month of January the biggest wedding-planning month of the year."

It's also important to realize that there are more couples getting married now than ever before. And as Buckles states, "Say there's a bride who's getting married on June 17th. Of course she thinks she's the only bride getting married that day, but she's actually in for a rude awakening because so is everybody else. There are only so many Saturdays in June, which means she'll be competing with others to get what she wants."

And the strangest part? Some brides feel like they're even competing with members of their own wedding party! While many gals love to share wedding plans with girlfriends and family, Marshall suggests not taking all your bridesmaids to wedding shows.

"Bringing the whole entourage along equates to that many different opinions and getting pulled in too many directions, because each bridesmaid, mom or mother-in-law-to-be has a vision for the event as well," she explains. "But you have to remember it's YOUR wedding, YOU are going to be entertaining YOUR guests, and YOU know them best. It's more important for moms and bridesmaids to focus on sharing this important experience with you because they will remember that special experience, no matter what colors or floral designs you choose."

These realizations, oftentimes exaggerated by the enormous quantity of brides-to-be at wedding shows, leave many women feeling disappointed or depressed. So just knowing a few emotional pitfalls that are common to these shows will help you to prepare.

KNOW YOUR STYLE (NOT YOUR MOM'S OR YOUR BEST FRIEND'S)

Like most wedding shows, the Tacoma Wedding Expo features a fashion show.

To save time and headaches, when going to a wedding show, it's good to know your style. Many people open up the floodgates just because it's a wedding and they can, but if you know what you like in your other areas of life — such as vintage versus modern or simple versus elaborate — listening to your style-gut will help your wedding better reflect who you are.

"Some brides knew when they were 12 years old what their wedding was going to look like," explains Linda Marshall.

But for many it's a matter of clinging to things you like and discarding things you know you don't like as not to waste your time.

"If you don't like feathers or seashells, stay away from the booths that display those styles and spend time with the ones that are more you," she encourages. "Come with magazine clippings of things you like and begin to create a vision in your head."

PREPARE — FINANCIALLY

It's important to consider your budget. If you go to a show with a budget in mind, you are more able to focus on the things that are most important to you and not get caught up with things you would normally consider frivolous or unnecessary.

Another word to the wise, there's no need to sign a single contract at the actual show! It's better to talk to several vendors and see who wants your business by waiting for their phone calls within a week or so after the show. If you really click with someone, make sure they follow up before you go further.

It's for this very reason that Marshall firmly suggests, "Don't spend hours and hours with any one person, because you never really know until you've both done a little bit of homework."

And if saving money is your M.O., enter every drawing and always sign up for more info on package prices and special deals through the wedding show. Dresses are often on sale and vendors are trying out new products for the first time, which can often mean big discounts.

"A tux rental shop may offer $50 off a rental if it's registered at the show, but this offer will not apply to those who didn't get their name on the list," says Buckles. "It sounds like the old adage of 'get it before it's gone,' but when it comes to wedding shows, this statement really rings true."

When you consider the cost of food for many people, venue rentals, music, photographers, attire and more, money can go quickly when it comes to weddings, so it's important that the dollars are spent well in their appropriate place — on the things you consider high priority.

So, before you go to wedding shows, just remember to be smart, realistic and prepare both physically and mentally before walking down the aisles and aisles of sparkling show booths. And have fun! You don't have to figure out your whole entire wedding in a weekend, but the shows can give you a good head start.